A Mother for 2 Zacharies

Preface: trying to fit life onto a page is like painting an elephant with a mascara brush.

Spoiler alert: I lie sometimes. OK, mainly a factor of forgetfulness, but still, I lie.
In my life I have been brushed by stars. I was recalling one such occasion today that was in the 80’s.

My lover and I signed up to be extras in Austin, TX. A lot of films are set there and we were called for one whose working title was unremarkable, but which was finally canned as “Two Mothers for Zachary”, starring Vanessa Redgrave, Valerie Bertonelli, and Colleen Flynn as principals.

We did a lot of waiting around, reading books until called in to a courtroom scene. As they ushered us extras in, Vanessa Redgrave in all her regal beauty was seated up front. I swear, space kind of warped around her, as though she was a human force field or something. But, more incredulous than anything, upon spying me, she walked directly away from her set place, came straight up to me, extended her hand and said, ”I’m so glad you’re here”. I’ve no idea of my response and how could I possibly remember given that my jaw, stomach and so many other parts dropped off line in the interaction. Why me? At the time I had no idea, and am still not totally sure though I may have a clue. Later I was to see her descending alone the back stairs of the courthouse, dressed in costume in a quiet topcoat. She briefly stumbled and for a second I saw her as she might have been had she not risen to become the star she had: just another average, anonymous Brit, working for the Empire, leading a life of quiet desperation as it is said. But she, obviously no ordinary Brit, had escaped and rose to stardom.

I’d never been involved in a film production before and could not identify the story it was trying to tell, nor the characters so I was not sure at the time who she was to be. I learned later she was playing the mother of the lesbian whose child she was trying to take. Valerie Bertonelli played her lesbian daughter. The incongruity of a proper English actress playing an earthy, American Southerner, while a married rocker played a lesbian struck me. It seemed, once noticing that, that I recognized how Hollywood routinely put gays in straight scenes, foreigners as Americans, and vice-versa. Strange.

We didn’t have too many calls for that movie and were shortly done, but a couple of related incidents come to mind about it. And the first is actually a non-incident. Because, years later, YEARS! I realized that for whatever strange reason, my girlfriend and I did NOT invite them to the local women’s bar! How could we NOT have thought of that!? But we didn’t. My ‘lover’ (our relationship was strained at best) was definitely the cleverer of the two of us, and she never even mentioned such a thing. Without a doubt we would have had to disguise the two of them. Heck, this was a film, how hard could that be? We could have danced like crazy! They would have had a glimpse of real lesbian life, which had to be good for the film! And to say it would have been good for us is putting it mildly! What fun!

But it was not ever to be. At the end of the day, we went home and they went presumably back to their hotel room. Lonely, I would have imagined. Most of all I would have wanted to be important to Vanessa! I could save her from her loneliness!

Oh well. But one more incident occurred of note. Both my ‘lover’ and I were Massage Therapists and at some point, Colleen Flynn mentioned that she would like a massage so Kim and I piped up. Thankfully, I got the honor and that night I went to her hotel room with my table and gave her a professional massage. While conversation is discouraged during massage still we talked of some things. And before leaving, I mentioned to her as I mention to almost anyone who asks, that I had always intended to become a writer, but that didn’t seem to be happening. She prompted me to look into the book, The Artist’s Way, and the next day brought me a copy!. What a sweetie! (I bet you thought I was going to relate an entirely different and perhaps slightly seedy experience, didn’t you? Had my ‘lover’ been the masseuse, seedy would have been a given.) I tried to use the book faithfully a bit later in my Austin experience sans the ‘lover’ with whom I was having so much trouble. (OK, just to give you a clue, I finally left for good the morning I awoke, wondering in what I thought was full sanity, if I could bury her in the backyard. Oh, yeah, time to leave.) But, to this date have not really utilized its tenets. Of, course I’m not dead yet and I still have the copy awaiting my attention, secreting the few tidbits I’ve hidden in it. I’m glad it worked for so many people, as reviews prove. But for me, not so much. Probably just my temperament.

Why did VR shake my hand? Strangest thing: again, years later, I saw a picture of her made up for a movie role, the name of which escapes me. But her hair was dyed platinum blonde, and swept back. When I showed on set that day, I looked similar! Not as lovely, of course, but with short, platinum hair! What a strange coincidence! I have to thank my ‘lover’ for that bit of cleverness. She always had the most ‘out there’ ideas. That I go platinum and she shave half her head was par for the course. So, I think Vanessa was just responding to the strange resemblance of her previous role and me and perhaps thought I had done it deliberately. Well, in retrospect, that’s embarrassing for I had not.

I have been touched by stars in other times and places. Some well-known stars, some more like black holes. Some led to enlightenment, some burned me to a crisp.